The NorMel House

Dead Dead inside and yet wishing it was actually true. Because it isn't. The truth is I'm alive. I wouldn't really call it living though. I'm existing in a world made up of pain, agony, exhaustion, confusion, and simply existing through it because nothing has killed me yet. Not the times of complete numbness to the world around me, not the extreme emotions that hit like a storm and threaten to take my last breath. They never do, though I wish they would. Seems anything would be better than this. Not too many people would understand my plight, though some may understand parts. I was ok-ish. For a person with depression, Fibromyalgia, Chronic Myofascial Pain Disorder, PMDD, back issues, complete lack of immune system and so many other health problems I was ok. For a while. I accepted that God has taken all 8 of our children to be with Him. I accepted that I would always live in pain. I accepted and even got to the point where I don't even want to raise children in thi...

By now hundreds of thousands of people have been tested for covid, however if you haven't, you aren't missing anything fun. We had to book our appointments 2 days away as the testing facilities were so busy. They sent us to an arena and told us to go in through the Zamboni doors.  With lots of "No Pictures" signs and double checking health cards we drove in a circle on the arena floor. Last stop? Poking a plastic brush-like thing up your nostril... Not a pleasant feeling, but what can you do? Then it was a waiting game...in isolation with the hubby and 4-legged babies. As symptoms left, new ones came. My body went through all kinds of things and when I called the test results line 5 days later the lady told me it sounded like covid to her, but my results weren't in yet.  Eventually I called and they told me the test was negative but by that point I'd already been quarantined for 2 weeks just in case. Regardless of what it was I had I was still recovering at th...

This week we heard who we should bring our troubles to; who we should turn to when we're going through tough times. What an amazing #blessing to know that the one we turn to listens and hears us! We call on a God who listens! As our #TuesdayTunes says "I’m not just hoping, I’m not just wishin’  I know I’m praying to a God who listens I know He hears me, I know He’s livin’ Yes I am praying to a God who listens" Check out Chris Tomlin and Thomas Rhett's "God who listens" and go through your week with this comfort; knowing that we pray to a God who knows your name, draws you close, and listens to your cries!  https://youtu.be/9sqLqR41Ulg #Godwholistens #ChrisTomlin #ThomasRhett #comfort #Heknowsyourname #Godhears #Godlistens

What do we do when everything seems to fall apart? Where do we turn when the world around us seems to be crumbling and we feel like we just can't take anymore? We often wonder how all these bad things can happen; why do they happen? There is a reason for all things, and the bible tells us that as Christians there is a definite purpose. As a result of our sin the world is no longer perfect, and bad things happen. But is that all? Is that the only purpose??? I don't believe so. One of the things the bible talks about is being refined. We are being refined by our trials, being molded into something better! Zechariah 13:9 "...and refine them as one refines silver and test them as gold is tested..." Isaiah 48:10 "Behold I have refined you, but not as silver' I have tried you in the furnace of affliction" Psalm 66: 10-12 "For You have tried us, O God; You have refined us as silver is refined. You brought us into the net; You laid an oppressive burden upo...

"You have searched me, Lord , and you know me.  You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar.  You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways.  Before a word is on my tongue you, Lord , know it completely.  You hem me in behind and before, and you lay your hand upon me.  Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too lofty for me to attain.  Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence?  If I go up to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, you are there.  If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea,  even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast.  If I say, “Surely the darkness will hide me and the light become night around me,”  even the darkness will not be dark to you; the night will shine like the day, for darkness is as light to you.  For you created my inmost being; you...

What do you pray for when troubles and trials feel overwhelming? Most of us pray for God to take them away or fix them, and while there's nothing wrong with asking God to heal the sick or to fix our problems, we need to remember that God knows better than us and sees the whole picture. If His answer is no or not now that doesn't mean we stop praying. Pray for the strength to go through the fires, for an attitude of trust in Him. Ask that His Spirit be alive in you so that the world can see you're different. In Christ, we are different! This week's #TuesdayTunes is a prayer to be " Different " by Micah Tyler.  

"All my hope is in Jesus  Thank God that yesterday’s gone  All my sins are forgiven  I’ve been washed by the blood"  What a blessing we have in Jesus! As you go through your week remember where our hope is found! Today's #TuesdayTunes is an uplifting duet, " All My Hope ", sung by Crowder featuring Tauren Wells. May it bring a smile to your lips and a prayer to your heart thanking God for this great blessing!

There are things in life that take us by complete surprise. Life’s pathway will bring struggles; we each have our own particular heart ache. Yet, we can be confident, we serve a God who knows the beginning and the end! He has given us a light for our path and we must trust our sovereign God; that He knows what He’s doing. When wrestling with assurance we can see that the devil is strong. He will do anything to separate us from God’s love so we must pray for perseverance! We must also pray that we will see God’s presence in our lives and that God will keep His eyes on us. By faith, through grace, we are united with Christ and therefore perfect in God’s sight. When we know in faith, that this is true for ourselves, then we may know that no matter thick or thin, no matter what trial or trouble, we are well protected, for He will hide us in the shadow of His wings. What a blessed comfort it is to us, to enter day by day, knowing that the Father sees His children through the lens of His Son...

Oh how well I know this. When I look at my life and myself I am amazed that God could love a wretch like me. That He sees me better than I even see myself and yet He still calls me His own. I've done nothing to deserve this love; in fact I've done all kinds of things to push Him away, and to deserve the opposite. I am a sinner, I dont deserve His grace, I dont deserve His mercy. How thankful I am that He gives it anyways.  #byGracealone #savedbyGodsGrace #undeservedgrace #thankful #notbymymight #amazinggrace #Godslove #extraordinaryGrace #inChristalone #ChildofGod 

Ok, so I know it's a weed... but theres something beautiful in the intricacies of this puffball. I feel like there's something poetic about it all. Most people would have ripped this weed out of their  garden long before it got to this point (it's stem is more than 3 feet long/tall), but then they would have missed out on how cool it looks! Beauty is found in many forms. I see the beauty in God's design, this plant has a purpose. Maybe it's purpose was simply to cause me to reflect on things, maybe not. Its reminded me to look for the good and the beauty in all things. God's creation is amazing, each life is formed and fashioned by His hand, even the plants and weeds. I mean seriously look at it, it's so neat!  I'm probably rambling; just some things to think on for the day "All things were made through Him, and without Him was not any thing made that was made" John 1:3  #considerthis #Godscreation #Godmadeallthings #beautyintheweed...

We're all lost at some point in our lives; what amazing grace we find in God. That though we're undeserving He saves us! On Sunday we sang Amazing Grace in our church. As you go through you're week remember to thank God for His amazing grace.  Today's #TuesdayTunes is a beautiful rendition of Amazing Grace combined with My Chains Are Gone . Sung by BYU Noteworthy in an a capella cover. https://youtu.be/X6Mtpk4jeVA #amazinggrace #mychainsaregone #BYUNoteworthy #BYU #accapella #undeservedgrace

My heart hurts today. I found out about a friend's loss today and cried. I find they hit me so much harder than before we lost ours. I want so much to say something to comfort but words just cant say enough, can they? I want to go hug her but all this physical distancing stuff has changed so much in society. I feel powerless... although that doesnt even feel like the right word, I cant explain it. My heart and mind are filled with prayers for her and her family, and all those who are grieving. I hope and pray you find comfort and strength in our Heavenly Father. 

#Waiting isn't always easy. Especially when in the depths of #sadness or #despair . But Psalm 130 reminds us to #hope in the Lord. Wait for the Lord for our hope is in Him, in His steadfast #love and #redemption . Sunday morning we sang from #Psalm130 so go forward in your week with this beautiful rendition on your mind. Be #strong and #waitfortheLord !  Check out this week's #TuesdayTunes by Shane and Shane "I will wait for You! Psalm 130"  Shane & Shane https://youtu.be/l8pCbtLeXzc # ShaneandShane  

To say the last few weeks have been difficult would be an understatement. At times it felt like hell on earth. Three weeks ago at this time I was fighting some sort of flu or virus, as well as a pinched nerve in my spine; the combination of the fever, pain, uncontrollable body shaking chills, headache, nausea, dry heaving, body drenching sweats and spasms had me begging for death. In shame, I admit to asking my husband to put an end to my misery, pleading with him for death. I don't remember much from those first couple days other than the pain, and overwhelming desire to have it all end. Despite my husband's pleading, I refused to go to the hospital, terrified of being put in isolation and suffering all alone. With all the fear and regulations due to Covid-19 I knew they would isolate me. Several of the symptoms being recognized as Covid-19 symptoms were wreaking havoc on my body and I wasn't certain if I had it or not. I only knew I was barely hanging on as it was. I was ...

Going through hardships, loss or trials can leave us confused and feeling hurt. We don’t understand why we go through them and can be left feeling brokenhearted. When struggling with life’s disappointments and troubles it’s hard to do as the Bible says in James 1:2 and “count it all joy”. It’s times like these that we need to remember what the Bible says in Jeremiah 29:11 “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” Though we may not always see it or understand God’s plans for us we can always go to Him in prayer. The best thing we can pray is that God’s will be done. His desire and plans for us are better than anything we can dream up or hope for ourselves. As you go through rough times it’s ok to cry out to God, but remember to trust His good will for you. Today’s #TuesdayTunes speaks to the broken hearted in a prayer that reminds us to pray that God’s Will be done.  Check out Hillary S...

I thank God for the father who raised me. He's kindhearted, generous, giving, loving and has always done his best for me. He raised me to serve and praise the Lord and I am truly grateful. I'm also grateful for the many other fathers in my life. I've been blessed with a wonderful Father-in-law who is wise and caring and has made me to feel grateful for both my families. To my dear husband, you're the best father no one seems to know. You've been a steady rock and Christian through all our children's births and deaths. Though you dont get to parent our children you show love and wisdom with all children. Our arms will be so full when we finally meet our children in heaven. I love you. Fathers come in many forms. To the many fathers in our lives, may you be blessed with wisdom and faith so you can raise your children to God's glory. To the ultimate and perfect Father be all glory. Without you, my Heavenly Father I'd have nothing. 

Love. A word that represents so much; that means many different things; that causes each and every one of us to think of someone or something. Our earthly, sinful nature has put a stain on the word and its true meaning. 1 Corinthians 13:4 – 7 tells us “Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.” True love is perfect, a reflection of God. God’s love is what we should strive to imitate. If our love is not like His it is hollow and empty. “So, no matter what we say, no matter what we believe, no matter what we do, We're bankrupt without love” Pull out your bible and see what God says about love in 1 Corinthians 13. As you go through this week, strive to show the love of God in all you do. Today’s #TuesdayTunes is a great way to remin...

For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord .  For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts. Isaiah 55:8‭-‬9 ESV So great and powerful is our God. It's truly a blessing that we dont always get what we want. God knows all things and what He wants for us is far better than anything we could possibly think of. Trust In God #TIG #trustinGod #greatisHislove #Godsways #ChildofGod #TheNorMelHouse 

God amazes me. While walking and playing with the 'daytime kiddos' I've once again been blessed with seeing God's incredible creative power at work. Beautiful tulips, lilacs and more have once again pushed their way through the hardened earth to reach for the sun. Stunning and vibrant colors, soft and pastel colors; an amazing variety of beauty that only God can form. If you've read my previous posts you may remember my ability to garden is prevented by my body's aversion to plants, pollen, trees, grass, etc. Funny how my mind's eye is in awe and wonder at all these things, but my body reacts negatively. Satan tries to hamper our relationship with God in any way he can. I've always found my faith is renewed and my sense of God's presence is strongest when I'm surrounded by His amazing work in creation. The fact that these lovely flowers faithfully return every year reminds me that God is constant and faithful. His love never fails. I've stood...

I'm not alone, I know that. But some days it sure feels that way. I'm sure I'm not the only one to feel this way; like there's a millstone in the middle of my chest and at any moment I could be crushed by the weight of it. Today there is so much emotion wrapped up in my memory bank; a lot of wondering about the things that might have been. 7 years ago I sat in an emergency room just waiting for the bad news. I knew it was coming. I had told my doctor a few weeks earlier but she had passed it off as first time nerves. I had tried to be positive despite my feelings that something was wrong. I didn't want to believe it, desperately wished it WAS just first times nerves, and up until those words were spoken I held onto that thin light of hope. I don't think you ever forget moments like that. Holding on to Norm's hand like it was a lifebuoy that he could pull me in from the storm with. Because despite him being there, despite it being his child to...